for valentine's day i bought new batteries

the woman's head almost exploded. she didn't expect the v-word. she was just acting out her role as a friendly starbucks drive-thru worker, asking me about my valentine's day. that's right. the vagina monologues, suburb style.

i hate valentine's day. not in an angry feminist sort of way. i hate it because of what it implies about love. that it must come on this single day. that it should be a large gesture, preferrably in front of co-workers, that will show your thoughtful dedication. that you will be judged. your remberance of this solitary, ridiculous day will vindicate us all of any expectation concerning loving gestures.

but i love the vagina monologues. LOVE. i love the topics; the discourse made possible through the project. i love the message of female beauty and wonder in our bodies-- those we so often detest. i love the goal of the performances-- to eradicate violence against women and children. and i wanted robyn to love it, too. and, to my pleasant surprise, it would be opening on valentine's day in prior lake, minnesota, population 10,000. the venue? a lutheran church. this seemed shocking. exciting. and it was.

i loved being surrounded by the 100 or so people and sharing their experience with the show. reveling in laughter and the heavy pauses of some of the monologues. chanting "cunt" as the red glitter letters spelling the word crossed the stage. sitting next to my mom during "i was there in the room," the monologue about birth. after the show robyn and i took our vaginas out for dinner. well, for blizzards from dairy queen. and when i got home, i gave myself a valentine's present. new batteries.