well, that's indicative (subtitled: here's to you, india)

when dave and i were traveling in january, we took mental pictures of things that were “indicatively indian.” clocks with no arms. cues with no order. the like. after four months of cultural observation cole deemed india, “generally illogical and irresponsible.” you might think we are badmouthing this country. that we’re condescending or judgmental of a system that is effective when measured culturally. maybe so. but in a country with “conizzas”—pizza+cone— traffic signs that go completely unnoticed and no sense of order it seems accurate.

today i thought that i had won the ongoing battle between india and courtney. i would like to believe that a game of the match has gone to each team. one to courtney for a stellar first semester at woodstock, one to india for dealing ms. humm the tko via typhoid, etc. on the way to the airport, i felt like the queen. i spoke too far too soon. when i arrived at the airport, after calling to confirm that my flight was on time (an overly responsible move for me), my mind was sent into overdrive. if my flight was supposed to depart at 9 pm, what could “4:24 rescheduled” mean? had i missed the plane? no. instead, indian air (the airlines that [along with my own oversight] brought you “christmas day in bombay 2005”) has also sponsored “june 28th at the skeeziest-supposedly-nice hotel in delhi” (yes, woodstockers, the centaur—site of the “mouse over joanna’s head incident). somehow, between the 5 hours i had confirmed my flight and arriving at the airport, all had gone awry. a roadblock impeded the completion of my global iron man-- 24 hours of flight travel in 3 days, almost completely circumnavigating the globe.

judge me for badmouthing india. it’s true, i am overly cynical about this place after my last defeat. i overcame the taxi scramble last night that impelled me into a rat race for my taxi cab, including shouting accompanied by angry gestures over my fare, and concluding with requests for compensation for no reason. apparently, tonight we were supposed to get a free phone call. there is no operator in the hotel. there is no word from the airline and our re-scheduled flight is supposed to leave in an hour and a half. i am on approximately my 24th hour of shitty tv (coupled with the crappy tv from the initial layover period). i don’t know what was more of a dive, “beauty and the geek” or the part of the “amazing race” when the contestants were bitching about the “gross,” “jalopy” cars in senegal or when they passed out candy to the children because of their “sweet faces and endearing smiles” and that it “made them feel good” to give them candy (which, in some studies, has actually been proved to detrimentally affect teeth. especially those not often seen by dentists). i left my room and my key stopped working while i was gone. i tried to overlook the bugs in my cereal this morning and the mob of pushy taxi drivers at the airport. and now, the time for perspective is through. in total, in three trips to india (counting the last 24 hours as a “trip”) i have been delayed for over 28 hours on air india and have succumbed to 4 gastrointestinal diseases. dear india, you are 2 for 1. throw me a bone, here. seriously.